these last few weeks without internet

Yay!! I'm so happy to be able to write again. So many things were running through my mind these past few weeks. The bad news is I can't remember most of it. I should start a dairy just in case. But it'll probably come back to me sooner or later. Anyway, the few things I do remember is having to think about
1. LIFE....what to do with it.
2. Tom....I can't believe I'm not over him yet.
3. Death...How scary it is.
The first two things are about the same questions as always. That leaves us with the third thing. Death. Just the word is enough to make me shiver. Nobody knows what happens when a person dies. I guess that's what makes it so scary, not knowing what's gonna happen. If everyone's going to die, does that mean we already accept death?? A lot of people turn to God when they talk about death. What is God anyway?? What if I don't believe in God?? Does that mean I won't be accepted in heaven( if there's such thing )?? Does that mean I'll be a ghost?? Is that why there's so many ghosts in the world? Because they don't believe? After watching the movie 2012, I've been wondering. If almost everyone dies during that year, would there be enough place for everyone to be in heaven? Or Hell??? What about that place? Or else, is everyone gonna become a ghost and roam the Earth til who knows when? So many questions and I bet nobody can give the right answer. Honestly, I think even a priest would sometimes be scared of death.